The Spanner

Console''s Paul Kelly

Console headquarters to reopen as lavish theme park

In the wake of the scandal surrounding disgraced charity Console, whose name has been permanently blackened by the revelation that its founder Paul Kelly was embezzling money, the charity has today announced t...
Titanic Iceberg in action

Titanic Iceberg Voted Greatest Movie Villain Ever

In a recent poll conducted by Oxygen.ie the iceberg from Titanic has been voted the 'Greatest Movie Villain Of All Time'. The iceberg narrowly fought off competition from seemingly more traditional villains suc...

Nukes Don’t Kill People, People Kill People

Due to mounting pressure from American citizens sickened by ongoing gun massacres, the National Rifle Association has chosen to arm toddlers with nuclear warheads to prove Islamic terrorism is the real threat. ...

Beach corpse ‘part of the plan’ says Olympics head

There were further organisational headaches today for the 'Organising Committee for the Rio Olympics' today after yet more problems were found with one of their sports facilities. Those problems came in the sha...

“Ballsbrexit” Referendum given go ahead

Dublin 4 to decide whether to become independent nation in "Ballsbrexit" referendum. The lives of people across Dublin have been thrown into uncertainty after it has emerged that all residents of Dublin 4 will...

Spanner Life Lessons: Adulthood FAQ

With the college year quickly coming to an end, The Spanner looks at some of your most frequently asked questions from young adults struggling to come to terms with grown up living, in the first of our 'Spanner...
selfie

Local Girl Confused After Ex Likes Her Selfie

'What does this mean?' was the question on Melanie Murphy's mind after her ex-boyfriend Liked her latest selfie on Facebook yesterday. The pair ended last October, after he cheated on her with a former best ...