There were scenes of devastation last weekend after a Wicklow family’s holiday came to an abrupt end.

The McDermott family of Aughrim, Co. Wicklow, were due to go to Galway for a seaside break, but it was cut short after Bernie McDermott ‘lost her shit’.

“The kids were acting the bollocks in the back of the car, it was doing my bloody head in. And speaking of bollocks, the big one in the passenger seat beside me did nothing to stop them,” Bernie told The Spanner.

The bollocks in question is her husband Tom, a butcher originally from the Arklow area.

“Sure wasn’t I playing Candy Crush on the iPad, I was completely oblivious to the chaos. Then, next thing, Bernie lost her shit and is doing a U-turn on the motorway. Could’ve killed us all,” he told us.

Bernie claims that Sean (9) and Maria (11) ‘would not stop acting the maggot’ from the moment they left the house. It all came to a head when Sean ‘wet-willied’ (the act of licking one’s finger and sticking it in someone’s ear) his unsuspecting sister.

“She was screaming like a lunatic, kicking the back of my seat like a deranged woman. It was infuriating,” reveals Bernie. “I was close to wishing she had never been born, if I’m honest.”

The children had been issued three warnings to ‘stop that messing’ prior to the incident. It was on the final warning that Bernie threatened to ‘turn this f*cking car around’, but it fell on deaf ears.

“Mammy always says she’s going to turn the car around,” said Maria. “But I never thought she would ever go through with it.”

Tom swears that he saw his wife’s head spin the whole way around.

“She was a woman possessed. We were back home in Aughrim in record time, she’ll have a few penalty points coming her way, I’d imagine.”

Sean declined to comment due to legal reasons.


Jade O’Leary