The title is not an exaggeration.
So just a brief back story so you can get some context. About two years ago when I was having a laugh on Tinder, I matched with this guy. He lived in a different city from me, but it was pretty common for people to go back and forth between the two cities. But when we matched, I hadn’t been to his recently, and he hadn’t been to mine. There was red flag #1.
But whatever, he was nice. So we chatted for a little while and he seemed pretty cool. We had a lot in common and he was nice. And then the next day (24 hours after we’d started talking), he asked me when he could come visit me in my city. Red flag #2. What weirdo flies to a new city after one day of talking to someone he matched with on Tinder??? He went on to say he would cook me fancy dinners and let me be his personal tour guide. Weird. I told him no, and that I was too busy at the time, and he kept insisting. So I told him it made me uncomfortable. So he said okay maybe after a few more months of talking.
So we kept in contact, but barely. Occasionally he would reply to my Instagram stories and shower me in compliments. Nothing too possessive, but still far too much for the situation. But he stopped offering to come fly to where I lived.
I eventually started dating someone in my actual city, and despite it being obvious over my social media, the other guy kept trying to stay “friends” with me. He didn’t say anything inappropriate, and the messages became few and far between, so I kinda let it be.
A year later, I was single again, and was going to visit my friend in the city where the guy lived. And I was feeling confident and spontaneous so I offered to meet him for dinner. My friend knew where I was at all times, and I kept my phone close. The dinner actually went well, and ended up with us going to an arcade and then out for dessert. There was no spark, but I have to admit it was a pretty good night. We said goodbye and I went back home at the end of the weekend, and our friendship stayed the same as it had been before.
Flash forward a year later. I had decided to do an internship abroad for the summer, far away from home. And as soon as the guy found out, he messaged me and asked for more details- where I was going, if I planned on travelling throughout it, when I would be around. It seemed innocent enough, until he started asking when he could come visit me. In a different country. Now I’m not someone good at rejecting people so I would just avoid the questions or tell him how busy I’d be while I’m here. But he kept pushing. And now that I’m actually here, on my internship, he keeps asking when he can come see me. And when I’m free for a weekend trip with him. Yikes.
Well this story doesn’t really have an ending, because who knows what will happen next.
(Hey mom, if you’re reading this- don’t worry. I’m fine! And I am NOT going to meet up with him. P.S. Miss you!)