The ISPCB (Irish society for the prevention of cruelty to buses) have released a statement outlining their dismay at the recent high profile attacks on buses across the world last week.

Two buses were involved in two high profile attacks last week. The Manchester city team bus was destroyed on Wednesday night when Liverpool vans threw bottles and flares at it. The next day, UFC fighter Conor McGregor was filmed smashing the windows of a bus in New York after a UFC media day.

“We have had multiple vicious attacks on our community over the last few days” stated the president of the ISPCB, Wheely Mc longbody, a recently retired Dublin bus who now caters to wedding parties at the weekend.

“We at ISPCB extend our sympathies to both our English and American counterparts. It is sad they have had to endure these horrific hate crimes towards innocent buses” he continued tearfully.

He also mentioned that there will be a ‘Bus Lives Matter’ protest outside the Dail on Saturday where buses from across the country will convene, which will provide support for buses who have suffered from discriminatory acts. It is unsure who exactly they are protesting to, but it is expected to be an absolute nightmare traffic wise.

We at took to the streets of Dublin to get peoples opinion on the recent vicious attacks.

“Well I feel bad for them to be honest” said Rory from Crumlin “They are already a group that are discriminated against a lot. Ever since the ‘troubles’ in the nineties they have had a hard time, and the Gardaí won’t do anything about it, they just let them at it”.

The troubles Rory mentioned were of course the vicious gang wars everyone knows about between the buses and cars in Dublin that was much like the Hutch and Kinahan feud happening today, except more brutal, leaving hundreds destroyed on both sides.

There is also problems within the bus community itself as bus on bus crime has also been on the rise over the last few years, which have added to the ISPCB’s problems recently. It is rumoured that the reason Dublin Bus drivers are always on strike is because of how dangerous their job is.

“The bleedin’ yokes keep fucking burstin’ into each other” said an unnamed Dublin Bus employee, who wishes to remain anonymous for fear of retaliation from buses. “We aren’t driving them at all, they have a mind of their own. If one of them see a rival gang bus nearby, they head straight for them.”

“Do you ever notice how you are waiting for one for ages then three come along at once? It is because they are travelling in packs for safety. Look how close they drive to each other aswell. They are taunting each other by doing that. They hang out at that depot out in Donnybrook, plotting their next move against the Northside buses” he said before waddling away, chicken fillet roll in hand.

John McAuliffe