Everybody who takes the bus will probably all come to the same agreement; it’s fairly shite.
For many of us though, we’ve no option but to endure a journey on one of these towering hunks of metal to get us from A to B, alongside all of the different characters you meet on it.
Never mind the fact that it takes forever, is rarely ever on time and it’s colder than your creepy uncle’s personality, it’s normally your fellow passengers that will annoy you the most.
Some of these characters are harmless, others will infuriate you but we bet you’ve encountered all of these people that take the bus at least once.
For some people it’s a necessity; for others it’s a sign of pure madness.
Those 7am commutes aren’t easy, and some of us will take the time to catch up on a few precious Zs before getting to our destination.
Others can’t even fathom the possibility though; ‘What if you miss your stop? How are you going to wake up on time? Are you insane?’
This might be unlikely, but everyone has heard the horror story of their friend/parent/pet falling asleep before waking up at the other end of the county.
If you want to risk it though, go ahead and get your rest. Please don’t snore though.
The One With The Headphones
Okay this is a bit vague; almost everyone needs a pair of these to make the journey even slightly tolerable.
We’re talking about that guy with headphones though. The guy that clearly wants the married couple at the other end of the bus know about how great their taste in music is.
Nobody knows for sure if this guy is looking to burst his own eardrums or just broadcast his love for heavy metal to irritate everybody around him.
All we know is that if you’re this person, turn your music down. Or just read a book or something.
‘Manspreading’, now in the Oxford Dictionary, is described as “the practice whereby a man, especially one travelling on public transport, adopts a sitting position with his legs wide apart, in such a way as to encroach on an adjacent seat or seats.”
The phenomenon of man-spreading and the subsequent backlash has been impossible to avoid and you can’t really argue against it.
For most buses, those seats are tiny and the last thing you want is to be sharing your limited space with another leg.
Sorry lads, it’s gotta stop.
The Phone Caller
“HELLO? YEAH WHAT’S THE CRAIC? NAH, I’M JUST ON THE BUS. NO I CAN TALK, WHAT’S THE STORY?”
Some people don’t understand that a conversation over the phone between two people should be limited to just that: two people.
Perhaps even more annoying than the headphones gobshite, this guy seems to want the whole bus to know about his day in town, and every minute detail relating to it.
Next time, maybe just try texting. That works, and it’s nice and quiet.
The Sick One
This isn’t his/her fault. People get sick. Sometimes you just got to struggle through the day ill, it happens.
However, when the sick one bundles up against you before coughing and sneezing over every inch of your body, you’re wondering if walking two hours in the cold is really such a bad idea.
They also never seem to have a tissue either. They just suffer, and they’ll more than likely guarantee that their fellow passengers will be just as run-down sooner or later.
The Clueless One
Who knew that taking the bus could ever be so hard?
You always see someone that just seems to struggle through the whole process.
They don’t know how much it costs, where to pay. When they finally sit down they looked bemused, with seemingly no idea where they are, where they’re going and when to get off.
Maybe they’re new to the area, maybe English isn’t their first language or maybe they’re just a little thick. We just hope they get where they need to go and that they don’t hold up the whole bus for too long doing it.
The Nosy One
Personal space? Privacy? This gobshite has no time for such trivial things.
It might be your phone, a book, maybe its just the newspaper. Whatever it is though, it’s yours and yours alone. It’s not an activity for two people.
There’s few more irritating things you will find than the guy sitting beside you, looking over your shoulder to read your texts, Facebook etc.
We find a death stare at this annoying menace will normally set them straight. Try it next time you encounter one of these.
The Friendly Stranger
We don’t want to sound too harsh on this person, most of the time they’re lovely and just want to chat.
Sometimes, albeit rarely, you’ll strike a good conversation with one of these strangers and maybe even make a new friend for life.
More than likely though, you just want a bit of me-time with your music or maybe just your thoughts, and this lad is just a little bit too forward for your liking.
Fair play for trying stranger, but please take the hint if your bus neighbour would prefer it if you just kept to yourself.
Fact: Apart from drunk students on the way into Coppers, you will never find a person happier to be on a bus than a tourist.
While you’re slumped there just trying to get through the regular struggles of everyday life, this guy has a whole new world in front of them.
They’re eyes filled with intrigue at their new surroundings, it’s very rare you will see someone so excited in a group of commuters.
Fair play to them, but a bitter part of you wishes that they were just as fed up as everybody else.
The Smelly One
The worst kind of scum.
If you’re sitting beside this person, all we can say is good luck.
If you are this person, feck off and take a shower. Now.