It’s all becoming very House of Cards in Irish politics as a smear campaign is apparently underway to sabotage the reputation of TD Paul Murphy.

Despite the look and sound of a bona fide right-wing prick, the little terrier has done a 180 on Irish politics by standing by a basic right, in this case water. But, after giving clearance to his cohorts to barricade and terrorize Tanaiste Joan Burton inside of her car, Murphy has reacted with typical aghast at the incident being followed up on by the authorities.

“They’re out to get me. The machine. The water-chargers.” he whispered to Sean O’ Rourke.

Leader of the Anti-Austerity Alliance, a reference to one of the Star Wars prequels, Paul Murphy has been tirelessly campaigning to have the water charges eradicated and has formed quite a following in doing so.

Burton meanwhile, has called the perpetrators of her imprisonment inside of a car as an act of ‘fascism’, while holding her right hand in the air with a straightened hand.

The people who were involved with shaking the vehicle, 6 in all, are not thought to actually include Paul Murphy, but he was standing by with a blow torch according to an unpublished Gardai report.