Katie Taylor secured her fifth consecutive world title last night, amid calls for her to lead the country out of it’s current predicament.

Taylor showed the tenacity and no-nonsense attitude in the ring that’s been sadly lacking amongst our government to efficiently dispose of Azerbaijan’s Yana Alekseevna.

It’s worth noticing that Katie Taylor didn’t once have seek the aid of the banks or hide behind a retarded hatchet policy to defeat her opponent. A patient and disciplined display of strength and courage was enough to send Alekseevna to the deck, as current Taoiseach Enda Kenny watched from behind his pillow and cradled in his wife’s arms.

Taylor now stands alone as Irelands greatest ever sporting export, and in further contrast to the shit-slinging government, seems reluctant to live off her past achievements.

When asked about the prospect of competing against Taylor for Taoiseach, Enda Kenny said:

“Yeah, anything. Give her what ever she wants. Free water and the rest of it. Just keep her a good distance away from me. Shitting myself.”