Joan Burton “Probably on the Rag” Claims Barry Cowen

joan burton
Fianna Fáil TD Barry Cowen has said that he believes Joan Burton is “probably on the rag” after she snapped at him during a sesh in the Dáil on Thursday.

Mr. Cowen, who was being a little bitch at the time, hurled a series of questions and comments at the Tanaiste without allowing her any time to answer.

Ms. Burton, who is generally regarded as the people’s hero, attempted to respond to his comments, but was continually interrupted. She then descended into a series of comebacks that many have described as “the pinnacle of humour” and “really fucking funny”.

“There’s enough histrionics [melodrama] from you now at the moment to fill the Abbey Theatre any night” Burton retorted, to rapturous applause.

joan burton

Joan with a deservedly smug grin as she enjoys yet another moment in the sun.

“You’ve the colleague beside yourself, you’re taking the ball and walking off the pitch”, she continued, cleverly using metaphors to highlight just exactly how much of a little bitch Cowen is.

She wrapped up her set with a stinging “Well if you want an answer, you just actually have to shut up for a while and listen to the answer”.

Mr. Cowen was visibly upset by the unexpected roast, and is reported to have run off and cried like a little bitch. Speaking about the exchange the following day, Mr. Cowen, much like any man who is confronted by a woman, claimed that Ms. Burton is “probably on the rag” and should “take a trip to the feminine-hygiene aisle to pick up some jumbo-mega tampons. Y’know, cos she’s a slut”.

joan burton

Pictured: A little bitch pulls a prissy face

Ever the quick-witted genius, the Tanaiste turned his own comments right back on him, stating “I think he’s the one who needs a trip to the feminine-hygiene aisle, cos he’s smelly, and a girl”. That comment has now been retweeted over 1.2 million times, including by such notable figures as the Dalai Lama & Abraham Lincoln, despite it not even being made on Twitter.

The world-renowned Abbey Theatre has responded to this with a statement saying “Obviously it’s Joan, not Barry, that we’d be interested in seeing on stage at the Abbey. She’s the one who draws in the big crowds with her humorous take on current events. Cowen is the one people want to laugh at. Burton is the one they want to laugh with”.

Little bitch Barry Cowen has yet to respond. Watch the full video of the exchange here.