Okay guys, here we are. All set and ready to debunk all of the myths in which guys think are true in relation to women. Excited? Let’s jump right in and find out the truth, once and for all.
Girls don’t drink beer:
HA! This one is my favourite. I once went on a date with someone, and he genuinely asked me not to drink a pint in front of him and insisted I order a cocktail or something more feminine instead. (I reckon he was just worried in case I could sink a pint faster than he could) Of course, cocktails are amazing because they just taste like sweets and get you drunk without the disgusting taste of alcohol, but €7?! No thanks. If I’m out and am going to be buying drinks, you can bet your ass I’ll be going for the €3 pints. I’m not trying to go home bankrupt.
Girls don’t date nice guys:
Yikes. Lets get one thing straight, girls don’t date guys who they don’t want to date. Simple as. Think about it, if you’re the only person referring to yourself as a nice guy then chances are you’re on your own in thinking so. Actually, scratch that. You should definitely go and buy a leather jacket, take up smoking and refer to every female as hot stuff. The girls will flock. Its what they want, bad boy. Bonus points if you pretend to forget her name.
Girls fall for chat up lines/Lies in clubs:
Listen, girls know. They know. I’m telling you. We know. We know you haven’t lost your keys or lost your friend whose house you were “supposed” to be staying in tonight. We know you don’t live in the same place as us and want to share a taxi home. We know it is probably not your birthday. Oh, and we definitely know that there is no way we’re going to be ringing that number that you forced us to let you put in our phones so you could look cool in front of your friends. It really doesn’t work so just be honest and roll back the bs. But definitely use that chat up line where you insult her so she’ll try to impress you. I heard that one works really well *grabs popcorn*.
Girls telling you they have a boyfriend are lying:
Probably lol. Best not broadcast that she lied to you about having a boyfriend to too many people though
Girls are cleaner!:
Girls are gross. You should SEE the state of the girls bathrooms in any nightclub. Its terrifying. Do not even get me started on bathrooms after girls do their make up. Product. Everywhere. Oh, and that little black dress she wore last night? There is a mountain of clothes piled from the floor to the ceiling of the rejects she tried on before that.
Girls look even slightly presentable when they have sleepovers:
I mean I get it. The movies show girls in little pyjamas, jumping on the bed laughing, having pillow fights, talking about how cute James from business class is. But lets be real about this. Imagine 5 girls. All sitting around in a room on phones/ laptops. Wearing massive hoodies and old pyjamas bottoms. Their hair tied up in the biggest bun you’ve ever seen that is plonked right on top of their heads. Maybe even throw some face masks or sudocrem in the equation. Now, imagine pizza. Lots of pizza. Maybe even nuggets. Sprinkle in some jellies and crisps, wine and high school musical. Now you’ve got yourself a girls sleepover. Oh, and some bitching about James from business.
So there you have it guys. The truth. Girls are just as messy, hungry and cheap as you. But hey, if you find or know someone who is none of the above, send them my way so I can get a few tips on how they hide it from you so well.