The leading pharmacy chain Boots came under criticism from Irish politicians for taking advantage of the drug loophole this week. Due to a monumental fuck up on behalf of the Irish legal system last Tuesday, certain class A drugs are now legal to possess in Ireland until the law gets amended on Thursday, 12th March 2015.

During the time that these drugs were made easier to get access to, Boots took advantage and offered a special of 3 for 2 on yokes and other frowned upon substances. While it is still illegal to sell the drugs on the island, it is not illegal to be in possession of them. Boots took advantage of this and simply left their ecstasy tablets in a basket by the door which were only allowed to be accessed by customers after they bought products from their infamous ‘3 for 2’ range.  It was up to the customers to pick out their drug of choice from the basket after the purchase of fake tan, this was all motioned to the public through a serious of sly winks and fast-tempo jungle music blaring throughout the store.

The Minister for Health, Leo Varadkar, said that the promotion was a “disgrace”, and further added that, “There are a lot of law abiding citizens in Ireland who do not need to take advantage of this loophole. These types of drugs are incredibly powerful and the last time mass groups of people took them Ming Flanagan got voted into the Dáil. This should be an indicator that they are bad news. I would urge all members to steer clear of Boots until after the emergency legislation comes into effect.”

In the meantime, the estimation of Irish competency is at an all-time low. However, with the drunken shitehawk antics expected to take place for Paddy’s Day next week, we can be reassured that as a nation we can reach deeper lows in the eyes of the international community.