Citizens of Dublin welcome ISIS threat to blow up the Spire

The Citizens of Dublin announced that they welcome the threat by ISIS to blow up the Spire if the Irish Government allow the United States to use Shannon Airport as a fuelling depot. The Islamic extremist group made the threat last night in a savvy YouTube video where the leaders of ISIS called the people of Ireland a, “Nation of Father Ted quoting drunks”, and that if we do not take their warning on board that they will, “Destroy the symbol of prosperity known as the Dublin Spire.”

Dublin residents were quick with their response. One Clontarf resident told Oxygen.ie, “Good, I hope they f***ing succeed with their threat. The thing is a fecking eye sore and it wouldn’t be missed if it were to disappear overnight.”

The stainless steel monument has been a point of contention by the Irish public since its completion in 2003. Many argue that it is a symbol of everything that was wrong with the Celtic Tiger mentality which plagued the nation during the last decade.

After its unveiling in 2003, one Dublin resident told TV3 News that, “I heard a rumour that it’s modelled on Bertie Ahern’s mickey. He has been known to be a bit of a needle dick, this is a fine tribute to the man then. In regards to the way the Spire looks, as with all mickeys, it may not be beautiful but it’s functional.”

The Irish Ministry of Foreign Affairs said it will deal with the ISIS threat after their department’s bonding weekend away to Connemara.

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