Finally, after an excruciating wait, Ellen and Keith have announced that they are still very much in love.
Their friends had been getting anxious after not seeing one of the couples famously adorable boomerangs on Intsagram for quite a few days. Shannon, one of Ellen’s closest friends, (according to their Snapchat streak of over 200 days), had this to say about the whole situation. “I hadn’t seen as much as a Snapchat story from them. It was very worrying, they are what you would call ‘couple goals’, so naturally, we’ve all been rooting for them and hanging on Facebook for a glimpse of their undying love.”
Another friend, Dan, known as Keith’s number one sesh monster, had this to say. “Yeah man, myself and Keith have been on some massive ragers in the past, but ever since he got off with Ellen, I’ve had to take a back seat. I was peeved at first, obviously, but then I saw a post about their one week anniversary on Facebook and my heart just melted.”
The couple’s usual onslaught of posts, pictures and tagging seemed to have come to a stop just yesterday, when friends noticed that they hadn’t gotten a snap from either party since the previous night. Shannon noted that “They just seemed to disappear, they didn’t post any throwback Thursday pics on Instagram, which are always the sweetest things, and there was no Snapchat story. None! That’s when I got worried and snapped a few of our other friends.”
According to Shannon, a number of Ellen’s friends decided to meet up so they could all monitor social media together. “We got dominoes to my house so we snapped Ellen a pic, but she didn’t even open it! She is practically attached to her phone constantly so that’s when we all got really concerned.”
It all came to a head when Keith’s friend Dan noticed that it was a week til their one month anniversary, something the couple definitely would have marked together. “I was scrolling through Keith’s facebook looking for signs of a failing relationship and I noticed one of their many anniversary posts and the date was a week from today last month, so obviously I panicked.”
Dan was hesitant to snap Shannon, as they had had an interesting night in Coppers a week before, but have had no contact since then. However, things had gotten quite serious and he felt that there was no other way to figure out the situation. When I asked him to comment on the night in coppers, he simply said, “It was a one time thing, she needs to chill.” I asked Shannon to comment but she declined to answer.
It was late last night when Dan finally gave up. He turned off Facebook and switched to a relaxing stranger things binge. “That Billy is some lad, what a legend. Anyway, I was halfway through the fourth episode when I got a snap from one of the lads. I opened it and my heart jumped. It was a screenshot of a post by Keith on Facebook from one minute ago.”
The post was a photo of Keith and Ellen in Coppers looking slightly dishevelled. The post read, “To say we had a massive night lads, would be an understatement. Apologies for our absence but we were in bits all day. Here’s to almost a month with this amazing girl.”