University student , Melvin, 19, has deceived peers by joining in the pre-exam panic by stating that he didn’t do any study, and instead stayed up all night using Facebook and watching funny videos on Youtube rather than studying for his second year Business exam.

While panic ensued just minutes before the exam, worried students swapped tall tales of how little work they’d done, and how they were definitely going to fail the exam and have to do repeats. The exam hall was turned into a house of lies as one student after another claimed to be “so fucked for this it’s not even funny” and “going on the beer straight afterwards to drown me sorrows”

Rather unfunny jokes were also doing the rounds, such as “Sure the real exams are in August anyway!” and “Ah I’ll just drop out and become a prostitute”.

When the exam finally began, Melvin proceeded to write furiously for three hours, asking on two occasions for more paper and at one stage engaging in a discussion with the lecturer. Other students looked on in despair at a man who had evidently studied his arse off and then lied about it.

It’s thought that most of the students did actually study for the exam, and probably did just fine and will pass comfortably, despite the worried glances exchanged across the exam hall and the negative reports afterwards.

Nobody went on the beer afterwards either.

Bunch of dorks.

Mark Walsh
www.walsho.net