They are 'blown away' by each other...because they haven't seen the movie

In Step Up 3D, we follow a tight-knight group of dancers ‘The Pirates’ who live and train together, and believe themselves to be “BFAB” (Born From A BoomBox), who are joined by newcomer Adam G. Sevani playing Moose (unfortunately Moose is not a lovable cartoon moose!)

Leader Luke (Rick Malambri) has seemingly forgotten about his obscene SATC-style shoe collection when he falls behind on his rent payments for their dancing haven. Unsurprisingly, the Pirates have some bitter rivals who want to steal the house from under their still-tapping feet. The story is one which has been done to death, and done better by such cult-hits as 10 Things I Hate About You so the twists and turns do more to nauseate than shock.

Step Up 3D has a documentary-style beginning. The reason for this is explained later on in the film, but the entire ‘film-making’ aspect of the film is unnecessary and our main squeeze Luke is inexplicably required to lug a camera around in every scene. Moose is an odd combination of nerdiness and talent which seems to fit his character perfectly, however his relationship with BFF Camille is almost horrific to watch. If this film is anything to go by, the best relationships convey emotions with twisted facial expressions.
 

The good news is that dancing is a lucrative business. Rather than selling off his prized Nikes, Luke enters his troupe in the “World Jam”, a competition which promises the princely sum of $100,000. Throughout the twists and turns of their troubled lives, our heroes just about make it to the competition.

The "World Jam" contains what must be the most (only?!) enjoyable scenes of the film. The raw talent in these scenes is so astonishing that it becomes a shame to have to return to a story we have stopped caring about. Our heroes first battle a troupe called “Red Hook” who have a strange affinity for Baby Powder. The ultimate results certainly won’t shock, but the expertise of dancers, whose acting moments before had us cringing, just might.

When we dig through the ‘smell the fart’ acting, the film actually has something good going for it. The dancing we see is technically brilliant. A choreographer’s dream combination of styles, eras and martial-arts techniques such as the achingly-difficult capoeira. The fault lies not with the film’s talented dancers, but in the enforcing of a cheese-infected story-line upon something that should be able to stand on its own twinkle-toes. It is a movie of around 50 minutes of thinking

"shut up and dance already!"

The cultural and personal diversity here seeks to show us that dance is the universal language without words. Yet creators Jon M. Chu, Emily Meyer, and Amy Andelson somehow saw fit to place another language on top. The final scenes are not so much an emotional climax as they are a relief.

If you love street dance and don’t mind watching a kid who somehow looks and talks like Michael Jackson reincarnated gurn for love , then it’s worth the €1.50 for the 3D specs.

The foundations of cinema are not rocked, but sales of Baby Powder and Nikes are set to go through the roof.

Ciara O’Brien.