Reports filtering through today reveal something so shocking, scientists claim it has the capacity to shake the trust of millions in humanity – psychics may not actually be hearing from the dead.

The devastating allegations come as a result of the ‘Psychic Sally’ show held last night in Dublin’s Grand Canal Theatre. More than 2,000 were in attendance to see the famous TV star, who appeared to make contact with the afterlife, especially dead women called Mary who had left the iron on before they died, and were just calling back to make sure it was turned off.

Before this pivotal moment in the history of psychic readings, these pillars of society were held in the highest regard as mankind’s link between the living and the dead, offering a chance of one last goodbye, words which were left unspoken in life. The thought that such mediums might not in fact be genuine, but were instead pulling such conversations with the dead out of their arse, was never contemplated.

However, on Joe Duffy’s Liveline, Ireland’s outlet for moaning, whinging and general self-righteousness, it was revealed that Psycho Psychic Sally may in fact have been cheating just a little bit. Callers to the daily whinge-athon alleged that a voice behind the stage was actually relaying information to Sally. "The first half of the show went really well but when the second half started we could clearly hear a man's voice coming from the window behind us. Everything he said, the psychic would say 10 seconds later. It was as if she was having the information relayed to her."

The audience member said a number of people in her row heard the man speaking. However, when an usher heard him, he berated the voice for “ruining the scam”, gave him a belt of a stick and then closed the window.

Stephen Faloon, the theatre's general manager, denied that anything underhanded was going on and said the voice heard by the audience belonged to two 'follow-spot operators' working for the theatre, and not Ms Morgan. Faloon also speculated that the voice may have been that of somebody recently departed, who was drawn to the psychic aura of the building, and questioned whether those audience members who complained were psychics unbeknownst to themselves.

Sally claimed she has heard voices from the age of four, and saw her first spirit at the tender age of six, which may or may not have been a sheet flapping in the wind on the garden clothes line. However, it was only when she decided to take herself off her treatment for schizophrenia that she decided these voices were those of the dead, and that she was inevitably a psychic.

From running a ‘psychic practice’ at home, Sally has gone on to star in television programmes for both ITV and Sky, who really should know better.

She has also penned two bestselling books on her life and work, and is currently writing a third about her death and afterlife.

Conor Forrest