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Man stays in alone instead of going out, enjoys self

'Time for a tug?'

A twenty-one year old man stayed at home last weekend instead of heading into town with the lads, much to the surprise of all of his friends.

Dubliner, Ciaran, said he was just too tired after a long week of work, so decided to refrain from going out on the lash and trying to pull a slag (also known as boarding the Banter Bus), opting instead to stay in by himself, watching The Sopranos and eating crisps and having a few glasses of Fanta.

“I just thought to myself, fuck this shit. I didn’t want to go out, that’s all. I was tired, I wasn’t arsed. I had a think about the effort of showering, putting on the shirt and shoes, getting some cans in for predrinks, getting the taxi into town, paying a fucking ridiculous amount of money on booze, having to shout over the music in the club, feeling awkward while dancing, trying to pull a girl, failing, and going home and waking up all hungover and feeling vaguely embarrassed and ashamed. And I just thought to myself, why bother? Why like?

So I stayed in and scratched my balls all night and had about three wanks. I lashed into the Tayto and the fizzy drinks. I didn’t spend a penny and I woke up early the next morning and I felt grand, and didn’t have to dread seeing Facebook photos of myself from the night before.

What the fuck have I been doing all my life, going out all the time? Staying in is the fucking business."

Mark Walsh
www.walsho.net

 
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Topless Ukraine activist grabs Euro Cup

(Reuters) - A Ukrainian women's rights activist stripped to the waist and seized the Euro-2012 soccer trophy while it was on public display in Kiev on Saturday in a protest against the forthcoming month-long championship.

 
The young woman, 23-year-old Yulia Kovpachik, is a member of the Kiev-based Femen women's rights group which believes the Euro-2012 soccer tournament being played in Ukraine next month will encourage sex tourism.
 
Kovpachik strode up to the silver, 60 centimeter (two feet) high trophy, which was on display as a tourist attraction in an open air exhibition in central Kiev, ostensibly to be photographed alongside it like hundreds of other sightseers.
 
But she then pulled down her red T-shirt to reveal the words "Fuck Euro 2012" scrawled on her torso. As she grabbed hold of the cup with both hands, she was seized by security guards, who appeared to have had advanced warning of the protest.
 
They covered her with a sheet and took her off to a waiting police car.
 
The protest appeared to be the first action in a campaign against the championship by Femen which regularly stages bare-breast protests in Ukraine - and sometimes beyond - to highlight what it sees as political injustice, social abuse and the exploitation of women in Ukraine.
 
Femen says Euro-2012, which Ukraine is co-hosting with Poland next month with the final in Kiev on July 1, will be a magnet for sex tourists - one of the group's main targets - and will feed a booming sex industry.
 
About one million foreign tourists are expected in Ukraine for the Euros.
 
Organisers said the 8 kg (17 lbs) Henri Delaunay cup was undamaged though Kovpachik appeared to topple back under its weight as security guards seized her. It was still on show in late evening.
 
Femen's spokeswoman, Anna Gutsol, said Kovpachik, who staged the protest on her 23rd birthday, was released after being told she would have to appear in court on Monday on a charge of hooliganism. The charge carries a maximum fine of 800 hryvnias ($100) and 15 days detention.
 
Conscious of Ukraine's growing reputation as a new destination for sex tourism, Euro-2012 organisers say they are taking steps to curb prostitution during the month-long tournament.
 
After Kovpachik's protest, Femen activist Olexandra Shevchenko told reporters: "We came here today to stop this Euro fan low-life from making a bordello out of Ukraine."
 
City authorities have mounted the trophy in a temporary exhibition area on Kiev's Independence Square.
 
Hundreds of sightseers were queuing up under the blazing sun for souvenir photographs alongside it when Kovpachik staged her demonstration.
 
Independence Square itself will be the centre of a huge 'fan-zone' during Euro-2012, capable of holding tens of thousands of football supporters.

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