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Former Naas Mayor to run for Lagos council

Darren Scully - Can't wait to get to Nigeria

In an ambitious move, former Naas mayor Darren Scully has now set his sights on getting elected to to the city council of Nigeria's capital Lagos. 

Scully resigned from his position as Naas Mayor after he said he would not represent the black people of the Kildare town.

Scully is now moving to the predominantly black country "to cleanse his soul" after the weeks events.

Mr Scully said: "I did something wrong and I want to put it right". "Though it could be a stumbling block that I am not an Nigerian national and that Nigeria is a Hindu/Buddhist country as I'm a strict Catholic".

Scully believes he is more than qualified to run for Lagos council due to his previously exemplary stint as Mayor of Naas, which won tidy towns several times during his tenure.

This is despite the fact that Naas has a population of approximately 20,000 while Lagos has seven million potential litterers.

The Nigerian locals are not impressed with Scully's plans and they plan to await him upon his arrival at Lagos Airport.

Nigerian national Imhotep Mikel in an interview said Scully will not by any means be welcome into the country.

Mikel said: " The Lilywhite infidel scumbag will pay for his racist remarks, he does not represent the Nigerian people and only God can save him now".

Sky News cameras have captured footage of burning effigies resembling Scully's pale features as the Nigerian people show their solidarity with the black community in Naas, Co.Kildare.

A local Black taxi driver in Naas is taking credit for Scully's crazy ideas.

Nwankou Precious said that he created a voodoo doll of Scully following his controversial remarks and that several needles to the head "seemed to have done the trick".

Psychologists have warned the Irish government that Scully should not be let leave the country due to his "fragile" mental state and that his new found obession with everything "black" could endanger his life.

Friends of Scully have noticed him shouting "what up bitches" on a frequent basis and he has also added 20-inch rims to the family spacewagon in an attempt to "get down" with black culture.

Scully has also began gorging on chicken while fantasising over women with "big butts".

Naas, the black community of Naas, and the bloodthirsty locals of Lagos are all eagerly anticipating Scully's departure.

Seamus Dunne

 
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Topless Ukraine activist grabs Euro Cup

(Reuters) - A Ukrainian women's rights activist stripped to the waist and seized the Euro-2012 soccer trophy while it was on public display in Kiev on Saturday in a protest against the forthcoming month-long championship.

 
The young woman, 23-year-old Yulia Kovpachik, is a member of the Kiev-based Femen women's rights group which believes the Euro-2012 soccer tournament being played in Ukraine next month will encourage sex tourism.
 
Kovpachik strode up to the silver, 60 centimeter (two feet) high trophy, which was on display as a tourist attraction in an open air exhibition in central Kiev, ostensibly to be photographed alongside it like hundreds of other sightseers.
 
But she then pulled down her red T-shirt to reveal the words "Fuck Euro 2012" scrawled on her torso. As she grabbed hold of the cup with both hands, she was seized by security guards, who appeared to have had advanced warning of the protest.
 
They covered her with a sheet and took her off to a waiting police car.
 
The protest appeared to be the first action in a campaign against the championship by Femen which regularly stages bare-breast protests in Ukraine - and sometimes beyond - to highlight what it sees as political injustice, social abuse and the exploitation of women in Ukraine.
 
Femen says Euro-2012, which Ukraine is co-hosting with Poland next month with the final in Kiev on July 1, will be a magnet for sex tourists - one of the group's main targets - and will feed a booming sex industry.
 
About one million foreign tourists are expected in Ukraine for the Euros.
 
Organisers said the 8 kg (17 lbs) Henri Delaunay cup was undamaged though Kovpachik appeared to topple back under its weight as security guards seized her. It was still on show in late evening.
 
Femen's spokeswoman, Anna Gutsol, said Kovpachik, who staged the protest on her 23rd birthday, was released after being told she would have to appear in court on Monday on a charge of hooliganism. The charge carries a maximum fine of 800 hryvnias ($100) and 15 days detention.
 
Conscious of Ukraine's growing reputation as a new destination for sex tourism, Euro-2012 organisers say they are taking steps to curb prostitution during the month-long tournament.
 
After Kovpachik's protest, Femen activist Olexandra Shevchenko told reporters: "We came here today to stop this Euro fan low-life from making a bordello out of Ukraine."
 
City authorities have mounted the trophy in a temporary exhibition area on Kiev's Independence Square.
 
Hundreds of sightseers were queuing up under the blazing sun for souvenir photographs alongside it when Kovpachik staged her demonstration.
 
Independence Square itself will be the centre of a huge 'fan-zone' during Euro-2012, capable of holding tens of thousands of football supporters.

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