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Closer reading of Darwin's 'Origin of Species' reveals repeated references to Unicorns

Mark Deane

Although Charles Darwin’s magnum opus ‘The Origin Of the Species’ is hailed as one of the most seminal and influential books ever written, scholars of Darwin’s work now claim that scientists and biologists have up until now overlooked the strange and repeated references throughout the book to the species of Unicorn- a mythical Biblical creature never claimed by anyone to have actually existed.

For example in Chapter 3, under the subsection ‘The Descent of Cloven Animals in the Euro-Asiatic Hemisphere’, Darwin claims that that the resemblance in “their frame and cranial dimensions indicates beyond doubt that the modern horse is descended from the unicorn”, adding several pages later that “changes in the species diet from grubs and insects to grass grazing meant that the unicorn shed its distinctive singular horn as it no longer required this to dig anthropods from the ground”.

Several Chapters later the Unicorn appears briefly again this time on the African sub continent when he argues that “among the many food sources of the sub family Hyaenidae [a type of hyena] were zebra, gazelle and of course Unicorn- the latter of which flourished on the mid African plains in what we shall call the late Minocne era”.

The irregularities with traditional evolutionary and zoological assumptions do not stop there. Darwin also makes reference to the “three month mating cycle of the Edenic reticulated serpent”, itself a biblical species historically believed to have been expelled from the garden of Eden which Darwin locates “somewhere in the region around modern day Baghdad”.

Dr. Herman Von Brecht a professor in Natural Biology believes up until now researchers have been silent about Darwins repeated tendency to swing wildly between empirical scientific observation and the assumptions of mythical and traditional folklore.

“In the space of single sentences”, he told us “Darwin is able to mention both the Opodiphthera Eucalypi and The Cracken, the lower mountain silverback gorilla and Grendel, and perhaps most bizarrely of all the “similarities in breeding habits between the Sperm Whale and Godzilla”.

This revisionist reading of Darwin’s work is perhaps the most unsettling discovery within a scientific tome since scientists came across a previously unread passage from Einsteins Theory Of General Relativity where he argues that “this curvature we observe in space time is uniform throughout the universe with the possible exception of the Delta Quadrant”.


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Miami named most miserable U.S. city

(Reuters) - Warm sun, white beaches, and million-dollar mansions notwithstanding, Miami has captured the dubious distinction of being the most miserable city in the United States, according to a new poll.

The playground of the rich and famous is home to a crippling housing crisis, one of the highest crime rates in the country, and lengthy daily commutes for workers, all of which have propelled it to the No. 1 position in the Forbes.com list.

"Miami has sun and beautiful weather but other things make people miserable. You have this two-tier society: glitzy South Beach attracts celebrities, but the income inequality has skyrocketed in recent years," explained Forbes Senior Editor Kurt Badenhausen.

The rankings are based on factors including jobless rates, violent crime, foreclosures, income and property taxes, as well as considerations like weather, commute time and political corruption.

Reeling for decades from the decline of the U.S. auto industry, Michigan's troubled duo of Detroit and Flint registered at No. 2 and No. 3, respectively, among the most miserable cities.

"Detroit and Flint are struggling," said Badenhausen. "Violent crime is highest in the country in Detroit; housing prices are down 55 percent. Detroit is closing schools and laying off policemen. In recent years they have been demolishing houses to change their city landscapes"

West Palm Beach, Florida and Sacramento, California rounded out the top five cities.

"We're trying to judge cities where residents have a lot of complaints. It doesn't mean that there aren't terrific things there," he said.

And for the haves Miami's charms remain undiminished.

"The one percent in Miami is doing fantastic. But for the vast majority, who make less than $75,000 (a year), Miami can be a challenging place," he said. "Forty-seven percent of homeowners sit on underwater mortgages. That's tough."