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In the upcoming months and years at your new college, you’ll see things, things that will change you, things that will burrow inside your brain and live there, things that will haunt your dreams for all eternity.

Lectures

Go to all your classes during your first month of school? Hey, great for you, now let me let you in on a little secret. This isn’t secondary school, your lecturers don’t care about you. Show up, don’t show up, pass, fail, live, die, they’re getting paid no matter what. Always keep that little fact in mind when you’re deciding if you really need to go to your 8 am class when you’re so hurting from last night you can’t even breath without being in agony.

Accommodation

Hard not to notice the smell that hit you in the face when you first entered your new room, wasn’t it? Bet you thought it was just a temporary thing. Jokes on you, because that stink will be a resident in your building far longer than you will. Your only option is to breathe it in, get used to it, and learn to love it. No amount of showering or cleaning will ever get rid of it.

New Roomie

During the beginning of college, your roommate most likely went to great lengths to prove that he would be your best friend, someone who always watches your back, and is always willing to share their naggin with you. Be prepared for an abrupt change as your roomie will most likely sleep away most of the day, shame you into drinking before class, and generally drag you down to the depths of humanity along with them. Don’t fight it. Look on the bright side, at least your not living with your parents anymore.

Food

You’re already missing home cooking, aren’t you? Despite the fact that your parents have spend an obscene amount of money on meals for you, you’re diet will consist mainly of pizza, instant noodles, and Capri Sun. New to your diet, however, may be coffee. Much like its more destructive cousin, beer, you will most likely hate the taste of coffee at first. Learn to love it, as it is a handy hangover tool and you will look forward to seeing it in the morning more so than any loved one.

Money

I’m sure you’ve already realised money is hard to come by. For some, it will come from a weekend job. For most, it will come from your parents. Don’t ever be afraid to ask your parents for money. Look at it this way, if they’re crazy enough to think that your being studious and responsible while at school, then they’re crazy enough to believe that you need money for “books” three-quarters into the semester.

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By Aoife Crilly 

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